Insight into my thoughts – Day 3/365

Today has been mediocre and if I’m honest, a bit of a wasted and shitty day.

I felt completely anxious and on edge all day for literally no reason and extremely tired – but it’s Friday tomorrow so only one more early wake up and then I can sleep in!

After a conversation at work on films, I realised there are SO many films that I’m yet to watch so I need to put a list together and power through them. A few of them being Chicken Little (thanks Caitlin), Would You Rather (thanks Alisha) and the Christmas edition of Beauty and The Beast (thanks Amy). I also really feel the need to get into Power (thanks Zoe, Meesh, Shannan) as they make it sound amazing but I just never have the time as I’m always either at work or asleep, maybe I’ll give it a go tonight. I really need some more film suggestions though so please everyone throw film ideas at me!

Anyway…

The one thing today that has been on my mind isn’t a nice topic but it’s something I am sure everybody can relate to on some level or another – and that’s anxiety.

I’ve been an anxious and paranoid person ever since I can remember, especially as a teenager and more so now after being diagnosed by my doctor. It’s overwhelming and exhausting constantly feeling as if you’re not good enough, that you’re doing something wrong, that everyone hates you, thinking people are talking about you etc – it’s also ridiculous because I can guarantee that no one is talking about me, no one thinks I’m not good enough and that no one in the office hates me, yet I can’t stop myself from thinking it.

I know so many people who suffer with anxiety and constantly feel on edge, not because of those around them, but because their thoughts race and get out of control which is scary because if loads of us feel this way, why hasn’t there been any advance in the treatment of it? It’s not something people should have to ‘learn to cope with’ or ‘just deal with it’ – you wouldn’t tell somebody with a broken leg to ‘just carry on walking’ and ‘if you have positive thoughts, your bone will heal itself’ so why do people say this to others who are suffering with poor mental health?

giphy (1)

It’s safe to say, I struggle with my own mental health and I’m not ashamed to say that as it’s okay to accept your weaknesses and ask for help – however it’s not okay for people to make you feel worse for feeling and thinking in this way. I am extremely fortunate to have a dark sense of humour therefore I find it easy to laugh and brush issues like this off and simply make a joke out of the dark things in life, however some people can’t.

My top tips for anybody who suffers with anxiety, or panic attacks, or even just anxious moments every now and then is this:

  • Tell yourself your name, age and where you live
  • List 5 things you can see
  • List 4 things you can feel
  • List 3 things you can hear
  • List 2 things you can smell
  • List 1 thing you can taste

If this doesn’t ground you, the next step that I do to fully relax myself and stop panic and overwhelming thoughts is body relaxation techniques however I will explain that in a lot more detail later on as it is something that I think everybody should know just incase!

Lulabelle, XO.

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